I was perusing a Facebook account of an old fling. I don't know why. He was also a long-time friend, but the aftermath of the fling probably makes that verb-tense just. I'd just seen two other very close long-time mutual friends. Maybe that's what put me in the mind to check in on him.
His profile says he's single. And in his description (or one of those
random thingies you put on Facebook), he said he was getting over a
crappy relationship. I'm either happy or ashamed that I have no idea if
this relationship was the one I knew him last to be in, or if there have
been others between. As a friend, definitely ashamed. As someone glad
to not have more twists and turns in her life than she has road maps, I
suppose it's a little nice to know I've managed to let this one slip off
But, that's not at all my point. Which of course you knew
that if you knew me and understand exactly how many paragraphs I
require in order to actually say anything.
A crappy relationship. It
struck me because with him in particular, well, he's the type of guy who
is always getting over a crappy relationship. Except for the time when
he's in the relationship with someone who could be "the one". It seems
that once they're over, all his relationships were crappy. Myself
included, I'm well aware. Of course there were things to make it crappy.
After all, we're not still together anymore. He's not still with this
new ex-dame. If there were no downhill, there'd be no crap. But it
puzzles me. Am I the only one who doesn't hold grudges against exes? Am I
alone in the thought that hey, we weren't made for each other but that
doesn't make you a monster? Yes. Some relationships were definite crap.
But for the most part, I believe it's just two cool people coming
together who turned out to be not-quite right for each other. I mean, if
I were to slander all my exes and call them scum, what does that say
about my taste? I heart scum? Why do so many people love to hate the
ones they once loved?